Classic Blackadder quotes

I found the below on an old e-mail and they really cheered me up....

Blackadder (on Percy's ruff) "You look like a bird who's swallowed a plate."
Percy "It's the latest fashion actually and as a matter of fact it makes me look rather sexy!"
Blackadder "To another plate-swallowing bird perhaps. If it was blind and hadn't had it in months."

Blackadder "I have a plan so cunning you could put a tail on it and call it a weasel."

Mrs. Miggins "Bonjewer, monsewer. It's French."
Blackadder "So is eating frogs, cruelty to geese and urinating in the street.
But that's no reason to inflict it on the rest of us."

Blackadder "Baldrick, I would like to say how much I will miss your honest, friendly companionship."
Baldrick "Thank you, Mr. B."
Blackadder "But, as we both know, it would be an utter lie.
I will therefore confine myself to saying simply 'Sod off, and if I ever meet you again,
it will be twenty billion years too soon'." [He leaves.]
Baldrick "Goodbye you lazy, big-nosed, rubber-faced bastard."

Blackadder "Oh, God, what a way to die. Shot by a transvestite on an unrealistic grassy knoll."

Blackadder "I'm afraid the duel is off."
George "Off!?"
Blackadder "As in sod. I'm not doing it."

Blackadder (to George and Baldrick) "Henceforth I shall pray nightly to the God
who killed Cain and squashed Samson that he comes out of retirement and gets back
into pracice with the pair of you."
[He answers the phone.] "Blackadder. Ah, Captain Darling...
You want two volunteers for a mission into No Man's Land. Codename - Operation Certain Death.
Yes, I think I have just the fellows." [Hangs up.] "God is very quick these days."

Blackadder "Baldrick, in the Amazonian rain forests their are tribes of Indians as yet untouched
by civilisation who have developed more convincing Charlie Chaplin impressions that yours."

Blackadder "I think the phrase rhymes with 'clucking bell'."

Percy "Made a note in my diary on the way here. Says simply 'bugger'."